Ride on Time (Black Box)

This song came out in 1989 and shaped dance music for the 90s and beyond. Italo House pianos, sampled vocals, model fronting the act... and a killer beat that beckons you to the dancefloor. Not the most obvious choice for a monologue since the lyrics make little sense, I thought it would be perfect to represent one of "those nights". For the record, I was completely sober whilst filming. 

So Close to Forever (Debbie Gibson)

A first for PopMonologues: a b-side! This song was the flip side to the single "Anything is Possible". Turns out it wasn't possible for Debbie Gibson to have another major hit, which is a real shame. The single was the lead for Debbie's album of the same name, which was a sales disappointment. This song showcases Debbie's "despairing in love" side (which she had already turned into a huge hit with "Foolish Beat"). It's a simple-sounding melody which would not have sounded out of place in a musical. I have taken the words and adapted them to a situation where a groom outside a church laments what could've been (pardon the Tiffany pun).

Lost in Your Eyes (Debbie Gibson)

Ah, Debbie Gibson. Queen of heart-felt teen ballads. I absolutely adored her in the late 80s. She was virtually unknown in Spain, where I grew up, and her songs were like a little secret I only had knowledge about. I briefly met her in 1993 outside the Dominion Theatre in London, where she was perfectly cast as Sandy in Grease. She was adorable, signed a CD for me and even posed for a picture. Unfortunately someone was handing Craig McLachlan (her co-star) a theatre programme at the same time and all you can see in the picture is part of our faces and the programme right in the middle. If you're reading this, Debbie, I'd still like a picture!

After her record-breaking US number one with "Foolish Beat", "Lost in Your Eyes" was another number 1 for her in the US. Inexplicably, it only made number 34 in the UK. Whereas "Foolish Beat" was about teenage desperation at losing one's first love, this was completely the opposite. My performance of the song is a completely straight reading this time: no twists, just a monologue about being in love.

So Macho (Sinitta)

Gay anthem extraordinaire! First released in 1985, this single could only manage number 47 in the UK initially, although it spent 11 weeks in the chart. In 1986 the song re-entered and climbed all the way to number 2 (kept off the top spot by "The Lady in Red"), gaining a further 17 weeks in the top 75. Sinitta is often remembered as a one-hit wonder, but she actually managed a further 3 top 10 singles. And contrary to popular belief, she only started working with Stock Aitken Waterman after "So Macho" was a hit, not before. Now more famous for her relationship with Simon Cowell, appearances on reality shows and "that" leaf outfit, it is a shame (shame shame) that her great pop voice isn't heard anymore. Check out the re-releases of her first two albums for some great pop gems and PWL mixes.

Anyhow, in its original form, this is a song about a gorgeous girl who knows what she wants. Although I find the lyric about not wanting "a boy who thinks he's a girl" verging on homophobia, this was he 80s so we'll cut her some slack. My version? About a deluded gay man who obviously thinks he's in a position to be picky when he hasn't got the looks to back his demands up. Filmed in an empty changing room, I'd have loved to film this in a gym full of hot men (Olivia Newton-John eat your heart out) or a busy gay club, but resources don't allow... This is very tongue-in-cheek, I hope you like it.

Affirmation (Savage Garden)

This song does what it says on the title. It's an affirmation of beliefs, most of which I share (some I don't). Some of the beliefs are reminiscent of the "Wear Sunscreen" essay which was made into a UK number 1 single by fellow Australian Baz Luhrman, in particular the line about beauty magazines promoting low self-esteem. In any case, it's a beautiful, strong lyric, and it lends itself very well to a monologue. I first imagined performing it as a union address, then it hit me that it could make a good lecture. Don't ask me how, but I managed to sneak into a lecture hall and use their equipment to record it. I don't own the copyright for the images I have used. If any of the owners object to my use, please get in touch.

My First Night Without You (Cyndi Lauper)

The second single from Cyndi Lauper's third album "A Night to Remember" (25 years old this year). The album is a true gem, even though it had disappointing sales. Disappointing was also the performance of this single, which could only reach number 52 in the UK charts and missed the top 50 in the US as well, after the top 10 success of its predecessor "I Drove All Night".  It took 5 years for her to have another UK top 10 hit (her final so far) with the re-worked version "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" in 1994.

I was moved by this song from the first time I ever heard it. It is so charged with emotion and delivered with such desperation that it gives me goosebumps. I should therefore have stayed well away from it for a PopMonologue, since my delivery could never match the rawness of Cyndi Lauper's. But it's such a great lyric, and it lends itself so well to a monologue, that I couldn't help myself. 

Recording yourself whilst driving, balancing an iPad on the dashboard and doing your best to make sure the sun hits your eyes while you say the line "the sun is in my eyes so I can't see" is not conducive to a great performance, as I was multitasking to the extreme. This was my second-best take (I managed to delete the best one by accident). Hope you like it.

It's a Sin (Pet Shop Boys)

This song came out when I was 16. I attended a catholic school and suspected I was gay, so the lyrics about how every thought, word and deed were a sin resonated with me in a way that few songs ever have. I wanted to film this in a confessionary at a church, but despite several attempts to sneak into several unnoticed, I haven't managed. So I used a (rather noisy) chapel instead. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa...