The Pop Kids (Pet Shop Boys)

This single is the first off the Pet Shop Boys' new album SUPER,  which reached number 3 in the UK and German charts a few weeks ago. The single failed to chart, but made it to number 1 on the Billboard dance charts.

I'm sure many pop fans identified with this song as soon as they heard it. I've seen several tweets saying things like "it's the story of my life" referring to this Pet Shop Boys single. The song is excellent, with a retro-nineties sort of vibe, and the lyrics take you on a melancholic trip down memory lane. Yes, we were the pop kids, we loved the pop hits and we quoted the best bits.

Hope you like my interpretation. Comments here or on Twitter. 

Nothing's Gonna Stop Me Now (Samantha Fox)

Ah, the Fox. S-s-Samantha Fox. A much better vocalist than people give her credit for and able to sustain a career for much longer than anyone would have imagined. This was the biggest hit from her sophomore self-titled album, at least in Europe. Stock Aitken Waterman were the perfect pop sound for her, although she would find bigger success in the US with the harder clubbier sound of her Full Force-produced singles. 

The lyrics of this song are about a woman leaving her lover. In this case, I thought the concept of escaping a manipulating controlling man, as hinted at in the words, could be used to give it a darker meaning.

Ride on Time (Black Box)

This song came out in 1989 and shaped dance music for the 90s and beyond. Italo House pianos, sampled vocals, model fronting the act... and a killer beat that beckons you to the dancefloor. Not the most obvious choice for a monologue since the lyrics make little sense, I thought it would be perfect to represent one of "those nights". For the record, I was completely sober whilst filming. 

So Close to Forever (Debbie Gibson)

A first for PopMonologues: a b-side! This song was the flip side to the single "Anything is Possible". Turns out it wasn't possible for Debbie Gibson to have another major hit, which is a real shame. The single was the lead for Debbie's album of the same name, which was a sales disappointment. This song showcases Debbie's "despairing in love" side (which she had already turned into a huge hit with "Foolish Beat"). It's a simple-sounding melody which would not have sounded out of place in a musical. I have taken the words and adapted them to a situation where a groom outside a church laments what could've been (pardon the Tiffany pun).

Lost in Your Eyes (Debbie Gibson)

Ah, Debbie Gibson. Queen of heart-felt teen ballads. I absolutely adored her in the late 80s. She was virtually unknown in Spain, where I grew up, and her songs were like a little secret I only had knowledge about. I briefly met her in 1993 outside the Dominion Theatre in London, where she was perfectly cast as Sandy in Grease. She was adorable, signed a CD for me and even posed for a picture. Unfortunately someone was handing Craig McLachlan (her co-star) a theatre programme at the same time and all you can see in the picture is part of our faces and the programme right in the middle. If you're reading this, Debbie, I'd still like a picture!

After her record-breaking US number one with "Foolish Beat", "Lost in Your Eyes" was another number 1 for her in the US. Inexplicably, it only made number 34 in the UK. Whereas "Foolish Beat" was about teenage desperation at losing one's first love, this was completely the opposite. My performance of the song is a completely straight reading this time: no twists, just a monologue about being in love.

So Macho (Sinitta)

Gay anthem extraordinaire! First released in 1985, this single could only manage number 47 in the UK initially, although it spent 11 weeks in the chart. In 1986 the song re-entered and climbed all the way to number 2 (kept off the top spot by "The Lady in Red"), gaining a further 17 weeks in the top 75. Sinitta is often remembered as a one-hit wonder, but she actually managed a further 3 top 10 singles. And contrary to popular belief, she only started working with Stock Aitken Waterman after "So Macho" was a hit, not before. Now more famous for her relationship with Simon Cowell, appearances on reality shows and "that" leaf outfit, it is a shame (shame shame) that her great pop voice isn't heard anymore. Check out the re-releases of her first two albums for some great pop gems and PWL mixes.

Anyhow, in its original form, this is a song about a gorgeous girl who knows what she wants. Although I find the lyric about not wanting "a boy who thinks he's a girl" verging on homophobia, this was he 80s so we'll cut her some slack. My version? About a deluded gay man who obviously thinks he's in a position to be picky when he hasn't got the looks to back his demands up. Filmed in an empty changing room, I'd have loved to film this in a gym full of hot men (Olivia Newton-John eat your heart out) or a busy gay club, but resources don't allow... This is very tongue-in-cheek, I hope you like it.

Affirmation (Savage Garden)

This song does what it says on the title. It's an affirmation of beliefs, most of which I share (some I don't). Some of the beliefs are reminiscent of the "Wear Sunscreen" essay which was made into a UK number 1 single by fellow Australian Baz Luhrman, in particular the line about beauty magazines promoting low self-esteem. In any case, it's a beautiful, strong lyric, and it lends itself very well to a monologue. I first imagined performing it as a union address, then it hit me that it could make a good lecture. Don't ask me how, but I managed to sneak into a lecture hall and use their equipment to record it. I don't own the copyright for the images I have used. If any of the owners object to my use, please get in touch.

It's a Sin (Pet Shop Boys)

This song came out when I was 16. I attended a catholic school and suspected I was gay, so the lyrics about how every thought, word and deed were a sin resonated with me in a way that few songs ever have. I wanted to film this in a confessionary at a church, but despite several attempts to sneak into several unnoticed, I haven't managed. So I used a (rather noisy) chapel instead. Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa...

Lie To Me (Gary Barlow)

The best Gary Barlow single that never was. The song was supposed to be the third single from his "Twelve Months Eleven Weeks" album, but the record company cancelled the single and dropped him after poor sales and media backlash. I firmly believe that if this had been the first single the album would have had a very different reception. I could have easily been the equivalent to Robbie's "Angels" but alas, it didn't happen. It's a beautiful song with a heartfelt lyric and remains my favourite song of his. If only I could find that elusive radio edit...

Opportunities (Let's Make Lots of Money) (Pet Shop Boys)

80s greed, Thatcherite economics, looks over talent... This song has it all. After the disappointing chart position of "Love Comes Quickly", the follow-up to "West End Girls", Pet Shop Boys came back with this amazing single (an early mix of which had actually been released before "West End Girls"). Of course, nowadays the relative failure of their second single would have got them dropped from their record label, so let's be glad that this single was a hit. It was their last single to miss the top 10 until four years later, when "Being Boring" only reached number 20. 

A straight reading of the lyrics. Let's make loadsa money!

You Came (Kim Wilde)

I loved this song from the moment I first heard it in 1988. I also loved the lyrics, about being in love with someone whose presence changes you for the better. Only I was wrong. Many years later I found out that the song (written by Kim and her brother Ricky) was actually about the love of a parent for their child, which made it even lovelier. 

This song became very special to me after my husband and I adopted our son. I used to sing it to him when he first came to us. He's now a bit old to appear here, but it still feel the same way. 

Thank you very much to Nico, who was a complete star during the recording, and to his mum and dad for letting me "borrow" him. He's a scene stealer!

Live your Life Be Free (Belinda Carlisle)

From the very first moment I ever heard this song, I thought to myself that the lyrics about seeing your (ex?) lover with his current girlfriend (or wife), yet offering to be there should he change his mind, would work a lot better if the chorus went "leave your wife, be free". Of course such a statement would not have been deemed conducive to radio airplay, particularly in conservative early 90s USA. 

As it was, this song, the lead single from Belinda Carlisle's fourth solo album, wasn't a hit in the US. Her career as a solo artist was a lot longer and more successful in other territories. 

Interpreted from a man's point of view, there's an implication that the object of the performer's desire is a closet case, and he's being encouraged to come out. I hope the writers don't mind the slight change of lyrics. I think they bring a whole new meaning to the words.

I Should Be So Lucky (Kylie Minogue)

Kylie's debut hit in many territories (The Loco-motion came first and was Australia's biggest hit of the 80s before Stock Aitken Waterman became involved) and still one of her most remembered hits (despite zero airplay even from 80s radio stations). General opinion is that the song encapsulates the prototype S/A/W song: banal lyrics and repetitive chorus. It is, no matter how many times she tries to make it somehow credible. Kylie had a bit of an epiphany when she read part of the lyrics at the 1996 poetry Olympics: after a period of denial of her pop persona and her PWL catalogue, she reclaimed the song and her past. She did not embrace it, though, wanting to give her past and edge it simply doesn't have. During the following years and sometimes to this day she tends to perform it as a torch song ballad, but thankfully she performs it in its original form too.

Her reading at the poetry Olympics was self-deprecating and full of irony. I think the lyrics CAN be the basis of an honest performance of longing and the realisation that one's hopes for love sometimes are only dreams. Here's my attempt.

P.S.: I'm going to give the Minogueologues a rest for a bit. It's been one every other one so far! I'll keep posting Minogue-unrelated PopMonologues, though. As always, comments welcome.

Ziggy (Céline Dion)

Written for the French musical "Starmania", the song "Un garçon pas come les autres (Ziggy)" was revived for the English adaptation of the Musical, retitled "Tycoon", with English lyrics by Tim Rice. Céline Dion recorded both French and English versions of the song, and the French version was a huge hit in France in 1993.

The song is about a woman who is in love with a gay man. With a little lyric tweak (forgive me Sir Tim) here's my version of it about a gay man in love with a straight man. Comments welcome.

Can't Get You Out of My Head (Kylie Minogue)

Another Minogueologue! Kylie's career-reviving biggest international hit. The dreamy vocals, multi-layered production, futuristic video, relentless promotion and THAT dress helped it to become a huge robotic-dance-inducing floorfiller. Written by pop royalty, the legends that are Cathy Dennis and Rob Davis, the lyrics convey an almost-painful sense of longing. Whilst Kylie's delivery is sensual, I've gone for a regret and sadness-filled reading, verging on the obsessive.

You'll Never Stop Me Loving You (Sonia)

Quite why the "From" which is clearly part of the chorus was left out from the title is anyone's guess.

This was Sonia's debut single and only number one. In its original form it's meant to be a happy song from an infatuated teenager, but without the Stock Aitken Waterman pop production the lyrics reveal an all-out obsessed stalker, possibly a murderer. I don’t think this is the interpretation Mike Stock was aiming for when he wrote it, but it’s the angle I've gone for. Does it work for you? 

Je Ne Sais Pas Pourquoi (Kylie Minogue)

Kylie. The ultimate pop princess. She's one of very few acts who've managed to transition from pop puppet to pop legend. Despite some misguided attempts at credibility, acting sometimes like a teenager who needed to show the world how mature she was, she appears to have come to terms with what her audience wants from her and balance it with enough creativity and style to still be herself.

The key to Kylie's early success was of course the behemoth that was The Hit Factory. Stock, Aitken and Waterman are among Britain's top producers, and Mike Stock one of the best British songwriters ever. Their legacy should be similar to that of Michael Gordy's Motown. Yet the latter get critical acclaim and radio play and the former gets derided, endlessly referred to as cheesy, naff, throwaway, and forgettable, with radio all but banning them. Even 80s radio stations stay away from them - trying to erase a legacy of literally hundreds of hits - with very few exceptions which don't stretch much further than Better the Devil You Know, This Time I Know It's for Real, Never Gonna Give You Up and, rarely, Say I'm Your Number One.

I always loved the bit at the beginning of the video for Je Ne Sais Pas Pourquoi where Kylie is waiting (stood up by some moron who clearly hasn't realised he's keeping KYLIE MINOGUE waiting) and - after doing that thing that French people do of replying in English when you're actually doing your best to speak their language - a wise "old" French woman offers the timeless advice: "if a man is involved, do not be so sure". I also absolutely love the bit in the out-takes of "Kylie - the videos" where we see Kylie getting her umbrella jammed in the door, but I digress.

Although my reading of this particular song is very literal, I think it's a lyric that lends itself to a little PopMonologue. I guess you could call this one a Minologue, or a Minogueologue! I recorded just one take and decided that it was good enough. I have played with the meaning of some of SAW's other hits. All will be revealed...

All feedback welcome.

I Will Survive (Gloria Gaynor)

For years I've thought that the lyrics of this song would make a great audition piece, so this was the first video I recorded. There's so much emotion in the text, which reads like a monologue (don't most pop songs? - except duets, which sometimes read like dialogues, with the exception of the frankly godawful "When You're Gone" by Bryan Adams and Mel C, what's the point of duetting if you're both singing the same lines at the same time). Back to topic: the character in this song takes us from vulnerability to strength, from victimhood to empowerment. Gloria Gaynor delivered it beautifully on the original recording, but as it's nearly always the case with pop songs - and even more in the case of disco - the depth of the text gets lost in the music, often shouted out with abandon at wedding discos and hen nights.

Love feedback. Feel free to comment.